There's lots of world out there...

I'm feeling better! I mean, the problem's still there, but personally I'm doing great! I still have a lot of work to do, but I can! You know what's really weird? FanFiction.net. The stories that I care the least about writing are the ones that do the best for me! Seriously. I made this one chapter story just for the heck of it, and in the last four days nearly twenty people have reviewed it. It's insane! I don't understand it at all... Oh well.

Yesterday in choir, Dr. J said he would have a big announcement for us today. And of course, we all knew what it would be about. That being where next summer's international tour will be. They've gone to places like Norway, France, Germany, Italy, and most recently Ireland. So at the end of rehearsal today, he finally decided to tell us, not without a joke about "I just saved big money on my car insurance..." Hee hee, I thought it was funny. And now, this is pretty much exactly what he said to us, and my mental reaction.

DR. J: Have you heard of Lake Victoria?
ME: (being the geography whiz that I am, my eyes went very wide at this. Everyone else just nodded while trying to remember where it is)
DR. J: Have you heard of Mt. Kilimanjaro?
ME: (everyone else still seemed to not fully catch what he was getting at. I was about falling off my seat)
DR. J: We will be going to Tanzania.

I had seen this coming, but still, I freaked out with everyone else. And the seniors were mad, but they can come if they really want to. Dr. J even said so. So yeah. As long as I get back in gear with my school work, get a job, and something doesn't happen that makes this plan fall through (which is highly possible), I will be in Africa for about two weeks next summer. Seriously.

For those of you who still are confused, this is where I'll be (I hope):




Actually, there's a story behind this. While on tour, we went to a church that has a sister church there, which is what got Dr. J interested in the first place, I think. We're mostly going there to help show them what it means to be Lutheran, and he told those of us that aren't that we'll have to be for this trip, lol. He also said that it's a British country, so their English will be better than ours. Again, it could possibly fall through, but he said he didn't want to tell us until he was pretty much positive that this was going to work. He even said that there would be two days for Safaris! So, I REALLY need to get a job set up while I'm on break, get my grades back up, and get a new passport, probably a Visa, and a lot of shots. Yay!

Valentine's Day has to be my least favorite holiday. I mean, it's named for a saint that got beheaded, right? For some reason, we say it's all about love, and yet I find it only to be a stupid excuse to give money to candy, card, floral, and jewelry companies. Therefore, I do not really celebrate it. Although, I must admit, those Necco Sweethearts are really good... ^^

Today sucked. Seriously. I once again couldn't find my Zoloft, and we had a choir concert that my parents came up for. This stuff wasn't bad, especially because I FINALLY found my medicine and can start taking it again tomorrow morning ^_^. However, here's where life went bad. Christie always gives me a ride to stuff. Always. She always comes to me and tells me when she's leaving. She didn't today. By the time I realized that she had completely forgotten me, it was too late for me to catch anybody else. I ended up walking about 25 blocks to where the concert was, and was about half and hour or more late. And her apology was... lacking. In fact, she's once again ignoring me. I tried not to blame her in explaining, and didn't even tell my parents about it. But I am sooooooo mad at her. Oh fudge, we have a floor meeting. Thus ends my ranting. If you know a way to bug Christie for forgetting me, please do so!


Okay, I'm adding onto this. God, I hate it here!!! It's a great school with great teachers and great acquaintances, but I have no friends. At all. And the people who do know about how shy am I don't try to help me meet people at all (aka Christie). We were working on some stupid shirt thingy tonight, and I'm not even getting one because I am not a part of this group. I'm just me. That's it. I don't fit in anywhere. The only problem is, I wouldn't fit in anywhere else, so I'm not leaving. I can't stand it! Apparently, my old roommate is now moving in with somebody else on this floor, which just makes me feel even more like a loser. I hate this. I hate it soo much. They wanted us all to make bags for people to put Valentines in. Yeah, like I'm getting any! I wrote "Card and Candy Companies Day. Was there even a point in me making this?" Chirstie's all like "It's singles awareness day!" Dude, her boyfriend broke up with her last week and who wants to bet she'll have one by next week? Seriously. She's such a freaking flirt! It's no wonder he called it off! And she just wants to hang out with her new buddies and doesn't even bother to really introduce me. Did I mention that I hate it here? I don't even know who I'm gonna room with next year. Choosing a roomie requires actually being friends with somebody, and I refuse to pay for a single. Lord, I hope I don't have to this semester! Sadly, this is probably the best college I'm gonna find, and I still freaking hate it! I now remember why I like skipping floor meetings, it just makes me feel even more pathetic.

I'm really sorry you all had to read that, but I just wanna leave these dorms and never come back. The best/worst thing is, I'm sure no one would even notice. But that requires me having to pay for an apartment, which I can't do. ERG!!! I just wish people would realize that I wait to be approached! I'm not antisocial once you start talking to me!!! Why does the best school still have to suck? Why?! Of course, this is me talking after a week of not having my meds, so that could be affecting it. Although I still feel like crap during times like this after I've taken them. I can't stand it here. But there's nowhere else for me to go. Just one friend! That's all I ask for! One!!! Please!!! ...Did I mention that I hate it here?

...Erg, sorry again,
~msbbt

Well, I'm back from tour! And I am pooped! No roomie yet, so I'm fairly certain that I won't be getting one. Oh well, that's life! Wow... I mean, tour was fun and all, but now I want my week off. And classes start tomorrow. Early bedtime for me!!!

I could go off on the wonderful stories of our trip, but they aren't that great even though a few are enjoyable, I guess. I just wanna sit around and do nothing for the next few days. Boo for classes starting tomorrow! They should have a "No class for people who were touring during break" day or something.

The Stupid... Super Bowl is tonight. I plan on keeping my usual tradition and not watch a bit of it. I kind of wish I could find an open TV, though, cause there's a Monk marathon for all of the non football fans like me. Oh well, that's life I guess.

I can't even think of anything else to say today...

~msbbt

Well, Vespers is over. I must admit, I highly enjoyed it even though we had five performances. It was much more fun than the high school concerts! Speaking of concerts, my parents are all excited about my band concert on Wednesday. However, I haven't had the heart to tell them that I've missed every rehearsal for this concert thanks to Honk! and Vespers, so I'll need to think up some sort of excuse so they don't waste their time coming here. Either that or pray we get a blizzard. ...Why can't I tell them?! I think I'm afraid of disappointing them. That's why I tell them that all of my classes are going fine when they really aren't. Curse you, phobias and OCD! Curse you I say!

Speaking of problems, I totally forgot to connect Sunday afternoon Vespers with Sunday afternoon work. I forgot to tell the lady in charge I wouldn't be there and by the time I remembered, it was too late to call anyone else. Needless to say, the Art Gallery didn't open today. I sure hope nobody showed up... People don't usually, but with my luck some huge tour bus or something showed up... If the lady who tends to come a lot came, I am dead meat. Only I could risk getting fired from a job that consists of sitting at a desk and doing homework...

I think one of my fishies is sick. One of her eyes looks funny. I hope she'll be all right, cause I really don't think it's possible to doctor fish, you know? Poor Terra... (that's her name). Sango and Hatori look fine though! Shoot, I'm almost out of food... Were my parents going to come on Wednesday like they think they are, this wouldn't be a problem, but my last final is on the fifteenth... I wonder if Schneider and I will have any free time to get some...

I'm the most scared about my religion class right now. I really need to talk to all of my profs, but I just get so scared! Religion is sort of fun right now, though. We have this thing called the Advent Service of Waiting tomorrow night, and it's actually just our class doing skits summarizing the course. Our group is basing ours on using the discussion boards, which we had to do a lot in the course. It's really funny. One kid keeps saying "I agree," and another one asks the dumbest questions. Then we have the "teacher" (which we're going to make our group leader play) come on and say that "he" keeps losing fingers, cause we had class canceled once because he got a really bad cut on one of his fingers. It's very funny. Another group is doing a class period and one of my friends is going to be the teacher. He was showing us what he was going to do and it was PERFECT! I think I'm going to have fun with this! Afterwards, we all have to go to Fryin' Pan (like Perkins down one level) for "breakfast" (at like midnight), and we have to sit down and pick up our water glass. Then we can leave or do whatever.

My mom got me the stuff for my crappy present idea, so I guess I'm doing it! She got me a ton, too, so I'm happy cause I was thinking "I may have to leave somebody out!" I also have auditions for "After Death" tomorrow and probably Tuesday. I know my monologue and all, but I need to throw together a monologue really fast. I believe I got a template in Acting... I'll have to look...

*looks back at entry* Wow. Did any of that have anything to do with anything? Yeah, didn't think so. That's why I call this RantFest!

MSBBT!!!!
~msbbt

(Yes, that does make sense. Right, daemonguard?)

*sniff sniff* Well, I just got back from strike. I'm so sad that Honk! is over!!! It was the best experience I've ever had on stage... Oh well. Auditions for the next show are after Thanksgiving, and who knows how that'll turn out... If I don't get in acting, I'll do tech anyways, but still... (although, the Honk! director is doing this next show and said "What makes you think you won't get in acting?" *shrugs* He tends to be overly nice though XD). I'm still very sad though... I mean, I'll see everyone (but the kids) again since I'm in other things with them, but I just feel so... empty.

Well, the votes are in! Nine audiences, nine different responses! And the winner of the Best Audience award is *drum roll, please*....

CLOSING NIGHT!!!

That's right! Our last audience stood out among the others not just in numbers, but in responsiveness (I just made up a word, didn't I?). In a very close second comes Thursday night, and after that is Opening night. Congratulations all of you, you tried very hard! ...Why did I even put this section in here?

Anyways, it was so nice to see my brother!!! I think he really liked it... XD. He seemed to be enjoying himself. David came, too, cause I think Rachel told him about it. I hadn't seen him in a while, so that was nice. I guess my brother can also come home for Christmas, so that makes me happy, too, cause we aren't always sure if he cane make it. My sister and brother-in-law (gak, I'm still not used to that...) SAY they can come, but we're not too sure ourselves cause that's when they're supposed to be on their Honeymoon... Whatever. Back to what I was talking about, he was telling us about his next show which is sort of an anime/samurai thing (and it's a sequel to a western.... o_O). It sounds so awesome! He apparently had to watch Samurai X for it, lol. So it's fun, especially cause I can talk to him about anime since he's seen a good amount of them (including Inuyasha). In fact, a few months ago he mentioned that he might base his role off of Sesshomaru. I dunno... I hope I can go see it, but I might be on choir tour and then have second semester... It depends on a lot, I guess. *looks at schedule* Hold your horses... I might be able to go!!! YAY!!!

*sigh* I'm so tired... Now it's time to start doing my school work again!!! XP Well, okay, I'll do that tomorrow... I'm gonna go to bed now... Or may just stare at stuff. Whatever.

~msbbt